And then a dragon appears

By Rita H. Chen

I’ve always been someone who remembers my dreams. Perhaps it’s a trait that stems from being a writer but I’ve generally had extremely lucid dreams in which I’m the protagonist and things happen in a fairly chronological order.

Whenever I have a dream that I find particularly interesting I will take note of it on either paper or, nowadays, on my iPhone. The intent behind this exercise, ostensibly, is to incorporate the contents of the dream into a future novel and short story – though that’s yet to happen due to my laziness.

I’ve also occasionally suffered from recurring dreams. The settings may change, but the circumstances remain largely the same.

They say dreams are a reflection of your innermost thoughts, feelings, and fears. Interesting theory though I don’t know if I necessarily believe in it.

I’ve had the occasional dream where I’ve passionately made out with other women. Most of the time, I have never seen these women in my life. Does this mean I have latent homosexual tendencies? Freud may likely say yes but considering I’ve had (and turned down) opportunities to hook up with women several times during my life, I feel like the jury is out on that one.

When I was younger, I had one really strange dream two or three times. I’d be trying to walk down a sidewalk when an overwhelmingly strong wind would force me through the opened gates of a graveyard. You’d think this is where I’d start dreaming of zombies rising from the dead to feast on my flesh but what actually happens is that the wind forces me through the graveyard and into the valley of a barren, rocky canyon. And then a dragon appears.

…Again, I don’t know what that says about me beyond the fact that I have an extremely active imagination.

One recurring nightmare that I’ve had since I was 13-14 always causes me to wake up, chilled and disturbed. This particular nightmare is actually the catalyst for this entry today.

The nightmare always starts with me in a house. I get a premonition that someone dangerous is about to approach the house and have this overwhelming urge to lock the front door. Not long after I do that, sure enough, someone (always a man, always older, and always sinister) walks up the pathway leading up to the house. The events vary from this point on. Sometimes he rattles the doorknob and slams his body against the door in an attempt to break it down. Sometimes he pounds on the windows with his fists and peers through the glass to gauge how far I’ve managed to escape. Sometimes he takes out a gun and shoots bullets through the door or glass.

What I do varies though I always try to defend myself in some way. Sometimes I run and hide somewhere in the house. Sometimes I knock the phone off the hook and dial 911 (emergency hotline in Canada). Sometimes I shout warnings to whoever is in the house with me.

Nonetheless, the dream always ends with the man entering the house and approaching me. It always ends with him aiming his gun at my head, ready to shoot.

I don’t know what to make of this dream. I personally think a lot of dream interpretations are hogwash, but even I recognize how vulnerable I always feel afterwards.

We can go into a whole flurry of explanations and psychoanalysis as to why this dream exists, and I’m sure every explanation will ring true in some aspect. Regardless of the reason(s), all I can say is that this dream makes me long for a time when things were less frightening, less complicated, and less realistic; and my greatest demon was simply a dragon.